He is my refuge and strength

                            Here I lay in a bunk covered by a mosquito net reading, writing, learning, and worshiping with my roommate.

We all decided we wanted to have a movie night with popcorn and brownies.

The movie choice of the night was “Sleepless in Seattle”

What a GREAT choice.

It has a rockin soundtrack and a sweet storyline to follow.

Not to mention Tom Hanks is one of the main roles and well I think I have said enough haha.

Today was a day that was full of joy.

Today was a day where I opened my eyes to see the world for what it truly is.

Beautiful.

I have been in Africa for almost a week and a half and I have never seen it the way I saw it today.

                                         

People keep asking me how I am doing.

How am I feeling?

How am I adjusting?

Well to say it was extremely easy would be a lie.

It has been an off and on battle.

I am learning that it is ok not to have everything together.

I am learning that I am going to struggle, a lot!

I am learning that life is not as simple as I have seen it before.

Here things have slapped me in the face a little.

A few nights ago my body decided to pretty much explode on me.

My head was about to bust because my migraine got so bad; I was continuously getting up hoping to make it to the bathroom because I was not able to keep anything down.

When you are that sick and not at home in your own bed it gets hard.

I was having discomfort.

I was definitely in a funk that put me in many many tears.

Because I was so frustrated and uncomfortable it was easy for me to look for a way out.

Satan came in at my weakest point and started to tear me down piece by piece.

I began to doubt why I was here.

Began to wonder if I was any help here.

Began to wonder if I just needed to go home…

If you know me these are not the normal thoughts that pop into my head, especially about this place.

I ADORE these kids.

I LOVE this country so much all ready, so for me to even consider to come home because of those reasons was crazy.

[[I do want people to know that I am trying to be more educated on the Ebola outbreak, and if it got to the point where it was near enough to Jinja I would come home for safety. J but no worries I do not have Ebola or had anything serious.]]

I began to believe the lies of Satan.

I sat in bed crying.

Fearing.

I texted my parents and some friends not knowing what to do.

I felt useless and broken.

After hours of this the Lord brought me to my knees.

I began to pray hard.

I began to pray for peace.

Prayed for my dreams that were beginning to get crazy.

Prayed for protection and my sickness.

Praying against the evil lies and fears I was having.

Praying the Lord would allow me to see where I needed to go.

As I was praying I also had others praying over me that night.

As I was praying I remembered this verse:

 “ The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still.” Exodus 14:14

I finally went to sleep and woke up the next morning about noon.

I was feeling so good it honestly felt like a miracle.

I was not sick with anything specific.

I was just still adjusting to everything here.

But the biggest thing was not that I was feeling better and able to play with the kids, but that I had peace.

I knew I was supposed to be exactly where I am.

I was to stay.

I began to be still in the presence of God.

Trusting that he was fighting for me.

And he was.

The day began to be more beautiful to me.

I saw the kids that I already loved and adored differently.

The sun was setting and it was the first sunset I had noticed.

We went out of the gate to take pictures with the kids running behind us.

They wanted to go on a walk with their Aunties and see the beauty of the sunset that God was making.

While we were walking we stood there in awe of the colors He made this sunset to be.

Dittee, Jamil, and Jason would scream with excitement from the beauty of it!

I instantly was comforted.

I had three beautiful kids of the Lord holding my hands and my back while watching a beautiful sunset.

His beauty in all aspects of the word is extremely comforting.

I am thankful and rejoice in His truth, peace, and beauty.

Not to say it will be easy from here on out.

Honestly, I expect it to get harder, but I am prepared for the fight and ready to put on the full armor of God and be in a battle with Him as my strength.

My refuge.

My power.

And my beautiful Heavenly Father.

With love and a prepared heart,

Mary Grace

I really love this song and putting it on repeat is the best!